The Power of Anger in Dark Times
Lessons from Psychiatry, Aristotle and Martin Luther King
“Depression is anger turned inward” is a shopworn adage of the psychiatry world, but one I find myself falling back on to keep from going insane at this moment, the last day of Biden’s Presidency, the last day for many years I will hold any trust in our government, the last day I won’t dread reading the news, anticipate the shattering damage to our institutions of democracy, to the natural world which supports us, to our safety and wellbeing.
Tomorrow under the majestic Capitol rotunda, an Inauguration ceremony will be held in the same place where, four years ago, the man standing there with his hand on the Bible, orchestrated a violent attempt to overthrow the results of that election.
I am deeply sad, deep like the sound of keening emanating from a cave at the center of the earth. I am frightened, frightened like a child abandoned by her parents and hiding under a bed. But strongest among my feelings is anger. I am angry like a lion. I want to rise up to my full height and growl, to bare my teeth, to roar.
Anger. I am sure many of you reading this feel some of this anger. But what good is it? Isn’t it likely to make us bitter or look like an unhinged maniac or lead to dangerous behavior like throwing pots or make us into mean spirited people who call other people names?
In my work as a therapist, I find that anger is the most difficult of all the emotions for people to regulate and to trust as an agent for mental well-being. For starters, many of us carry from childhood strong prohibitions about even feeling angry, much less expressing anger. So instead, we repress that anger and act it out in unpleasant ways, like the famous passive aggressive move of responding to conflict by silence and withholding affection. Women are afraid to be angry because women are taught to be nice, and men are afraid to be angry because they are afraid of the violent physical harm they could cause.
Additionally, there are very different cultural messages about anger. When I moved to New England after growing up in New York, I discovered that what felt to me like a very tame verbal expression of anger scared the living daylights out of some of my new Anglo-Saxon friends.
Even the word anger scares people because of the association between anger and violence. I wish there were more words for the many different faces of anger. For the feeing as it first rises in the throat and the belly; for the disturbance of the mind it causes when the amygdala is activated and triggers the release of neurotransmitters like adrenaline and noradrenaline and the disturbance in the body when the heart rate increases and muscles in the jaw and shoulders tighten; for the modulation of anger and its power when it is harnessed towards what Aristotle called the right purpose:
Anybody can become angry-that is easy; but to be angry with the right person, and to the right degree, and at the right time, and for the right purpose, and in the right way-that is not within everybody’s power and is not easy. Aristotle
Learning how to engage the prefrontal cortex to manage this neurobiological state called anger in the manner Aristotle describes is a learned skill, like learning to play the violin. The problem is that most of us have not been taught to manage this energy and so play our anger out in harsh and strident notes while the people around us hold their ears or send us to our rooms. Or we repress our anger and…this brings me back to the beginning, to those words, depression is anger turned inward.
So, reader, if you are one of the many people who shy away from validating your feelings of anger and using those feelings as data about what you love and what you want to preserve and instead think you need to “give it up” and find another more peaceful way to negotiate this moment in time, I urge you to try something new.
Experiment with this moment. Find something you care about that is threatened. Allow the anger to rise in your body. Stay with that feeling a little bit every day and then vow to find a “right purpose” to turn that anger towards change.
For inspiration in this we can turn to Martin Luther King. Not only is tomorrow the day of the Inauguration, but it is also a day we give honor to Martin Luther, a man who had much to say about anger, a man whose anger, because of the color of his skin, was strictly forbidden him as any expression of a black man’s anger endangered that man’s life.
But despite the threat, King did not turn his anger inward and become depressed. He is a man who taught us how to use anger for change. King tempered his anger with love and then funneled the energy of that anger wedded to love into constructive non-violent action. This is a quote from King’s lawyer and speech writer, Clarence Jones.
"From Dr. King's standpoint, anger is part of a process that includes anger, forgiveness, redemption and love."
In the quote below taken from King’s famous 1963 piece, “Letter from a Birmingham Jail,” King uses the word “tension” as one form of anger.
I must confess that I am not afraid of the word "tension." I have earnestly worked and preached against violent tension, but there is a type of constructive nonviolent tension that is necessary for growth. Just as Socrates felt that it was necessary to create a tension in the mind so that individuals could rise from the bondage of myths and half-truths to the unfettered realm of creative analysis and objective appraisal, we must see the need of having nonviolent gadflies to create the kind of tension in society that will help men to rise from the dark depths of prejudice and racism to the majestic heights of understanding and brotherhood. So, the purpose of direct action is to create a situation so crisis-packed that it will inevitably open the door to negotiation.
His words inspire me to find a way every day to funnel my anger and love into resistance instead of turning it inward and feeling helpless or depressed. What kind of resistance can I, an angry old woman, put up that would matter?
The argument that my actions won’t matter was beautifully countered this week by Robert Hubbell in his January 17 Substack piece titled, “Resistance without disengaging”.
…in this mixed-up, difficult, confusing situation, don’t let anyone tell you that you should not resist because “It won’t matter” or “It won’t scale.” If the Civil Rights Era resisters had followed that advice, Jim Crow laws would still be in force across the South. If you choose to give up Facebook as an act of resistance, do so not because it might change Mark Zuckerberg but because it will change you. And in the process, you may change history
Fortified with Hubbell’s argument, I am prepared to resist with my pocketbook and my social media accounts. I don’t have to give one cent to any of the sleazy billionaires who support Trump’s nominee for Treasury Secretary, billionaire Scott Bessent, who said that extending the 2017 Trump tax cuts was "the single most important economic issue of the day" but raising the federal minimum wage beyond $7.25 where it has been since 2009 is off the table.
I don’t have to use my Citi Bank credit card ever again. Citi Bank, one of the top funders of new fossil fuel infrastructure. I’ve cut up that card. Take that Jane Fraser.
Dropping Facebook is in my opinion a no brainer. No one I know uses it for any socially responsible causes. If I need to know how my Aunt Sally is doing in Oklahoma, I can call her. A few weeks ago, I started the process of closing my Facebook account. That too made me furious. They keep your account open for a month after you declare you want to close it and immediately ask you if you have changed your mind. Then they use your data and keep it in their files for another 90 days. I understand there is a boycott afoot for Facebook accounts. Join it. Take that Mark Zuckerberg.
I’ve pledged not to order anything this year from Amazon. If I need a book, I can order it from my local bookstore. For me, Amazon shopping is all about fast gratification, not about ordering anything essential. Take that Jeff Bezos.
I’ve never been on Twitter so I can’t snub my nose at Elon by dropping that account, but I can be sure not to buy one of his cars when our twenty-year-old SUV finally kicks the dust. Take that Elon!
I would love to expand my list of Take That resistance choices and invite you, readers, to leave your ideas in the comments section or reply to this email. I will post your suggestions next week so every day we can turn away from despair and depression and experience a little sliver of amygdala delight by turning that anger outward towards the rigged system and its sleazy billionaires.
To roaring!! To resistance! To love!!
Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere. We are caught in an inescapable network of mutuality, tied in a single garment of destiny. Whatever affects one directly affects all indirectly. Martin Luther King
I just cancelled my home and auto policy with Liberty Mutual because they and State Farm are happily insuring new fossil fuel projects. I switched to Amica and actually saved money. I will also walk across the street in Freeport to Patagonia for all of my NECESSARY outdoor clothing. They truly care about climate change.
Thank you Kathleen. Anger has its place. But as you suggest, it doesn’t have to be in opposition to wisdom and compassion. It can lead to effective action.
Looking at the list of donors to the inauguration, and dropping patronage as much as possible. Sacrifice is the name of the game right now. It is probably impossible to get this one perfect. We drive cars, we buy gasoline, we buy food. The layers of embedding are beyond knowing.
But we can do better. We can buy local. We can educate ourselves as to who has supported the Orange Nightmare (Home Depot, Walmart, Hobby Lobby). And shop less at these places. The fact of Amazon etc. is that we are all trying to save money. And we need to. But if money is still our driving force, then we are still part of the problem, and not the solution.