Wonderful, Kathleen! The fear of aging is also a fear of death and you and I know what a taboo topic that is! Shall we carpool to the March 30th standout at the Westbrook Chase Bank?
Oh yes, Judith...also a fear of death. A whole other column. One you could write! A huge topic. So much to re-examine! With my wise old friends. Yes to the standout!!
And we will take pictures of how cool we are out there and splash them all over!!
I'm not real afraid! But I am very sympathetic! Western "culture" of late has been obsessed with youth culture. When young, I was a card carrying member. "Hope I die before I get old" the Who sung. I loved that song ('My Generation')!
East Asian Confucian influenced societies have a very different view. I've lived there and can attest to the truth of it.
Every week I look forward to reading what you've taken the time and effort to write and share with people who are fortunately enough to receive and read it. Your observations are insightful, inspiring and thought-provoking.
Today and last week have been especially outstanding! I'm 72; maybe a few years younger but by 2024 American culture standards qualify as an "old woman". Age brings gifts and losses; it's much more of a roller coaster ride than people are led to believe. I too am often shocked by my reflection in mirrors and windows; no surprised-after a lifetime of exposure to countless negative images and messages to a deluge of negative images/ messages about being old- it's almost inevitable one internalizes horror and shame. While these demons can be vexing at times, I am so much happier, content and brave than I was as a younger woman. Rather than try to hide and lie about my age, I am opting to spread my wings and speak truth to power; I no longer have to be concerned with losing a job or what people that I dislike or don't really matter think of me. I've opting to be a force to be reckoned with so I can do I can to make the world a livable place for all those I love and all those who will come after me. I urge others to find groups like Third Act so you can meet, work with and be inspired by other older people.
YES: “ageism is so pervasive in our culture that most of us, old and young alike, have so internalized our negative beliefs about old people that we have no awareness of them as discriminatory biases or prejudices which need to be examined.”
I’m 56 and have a 17 year old so I’m often labeled an old mom. There should be pride in that word “old” not shame. Miss you Kitty!! Elizabeth and I were just talking about the lifeline our Covid writing group gave us.
Thank you for your excellent essay, Kathleen; it’s made me reevaluate what’s been my mantra for years: Neil Young’s statement “it’s better to burn out than fade away.”
I think the negative cultural and societal stereotypes of aging are more pronounced toward women than men.
Wonderful, Kathleen! The fear of aging is also a fear of death and you and I know what a taboo topic that is! Shall we carpool to the March 30th standout at the Westbrook Chase Bank?
Oh yes, Judith...also a fear of death. A whole other column. One you could write! A huge topic. So much to re-examine! With my wise old friends. Yes to the standout!!
And we will take pictures of how cool we are out there and splash them all over!!
You have expressed it perfectly—and they should be afraid. Thanks again for all the ways you inspire me!
Well you are an inspiration yourself, Molly Mulhern! Thank you for your presence and your writings and activism!!
Now the Who suggested we elderly just "fade away.". But I reply "Not Fade Away.". Thank you Holly and Stones! Love is eternal.
I'm not real afraid! But I am very sympathetic! Western "culture" of late has been obsessed with youth culture. When young, I was a card carrying member. "Hope I die before I get old" the Who sung. I loved that song ('My Generation')!
East Asian Confucian influenced societies have a very different view. I've lived there and can attest to the truth of it.
https://www.research.colostate.edu/healthyagingcenter/2022/01/28/aging-around-the-world/#:~:text=Confucian%20values%20promote%20a%20positive,respect%2C%20obedience%2C%20and%20care
WE need that Confucian wisdom you have Michael!
Hi Kathleen,
Every week I look forward to reading what you've taken the time and effort to write and share with people who are fortunately enough to receive and read it. Your observations are insightful, inspiring and thought-provoking.
Today and last week have been especially outstanding! I'm 72; maybe a few years younger but by 2024 American culture standards qualify as an "old woman". Age brings gifts and losses; it's much more of a roller coaster ride than people are led to believe. I too am often shocked by my reflection in mirrors and windows; no surprised-after a lifetime of exposure to countless negative images and messages to a deluge of negative images/ messages about being old- it's almost inevitable one internalizes horror and shame. While these demons can be vexing at times, I am so much happier, content and brave than I was as a younger woman. Rather than try to hide and lie about my age, I am opting to spread my wings and speak truth to power; I no longer have to be concerned with losing a job or what people that I dislike or don't really matter think of me. I've opting to be a force to be reckoned with so I can do I can to make the world a livable place for all those I love and all those who will come after me. I urge others to find groups like Third Act so you can meet, work with and be inspired by other older people.
Thanks,
Mary Ann Cernak
Thank you, Kathleen. As a woman of almost 62, I take inspiration from your words and from you. I love your excerpt from your poem, especially:
“Sometimes you have to walk all the way to the end
before you can see
the path
behind,
behold the violence
and the dying,
lock eyes with the ghosts
murmuring in the shadows.”
🙏
YES: “ageism is so pervasive in our culture that most of us, old and young alike, have so internalized our negative beliefs about old people that we have no awareness of them as discriminatory biases or prejudices which need to be examined.”
I’m 56 and have a 17 year old so I’m often labeled an old mom. There should be pride in that word “old” not shame. Miss you Kitty!! Elizabeth and I were just talking about the lifeline our Covid writing group gave us.
You're my favorite old lady!
Thank you for your excellent essay, Kathleen; it’s made me reevaluate what’s been my mantra for years: Neil Young’s statement “it’s better to burn out than fade away.”
I think the negative cultural and societal stereotypes of aging are more pronounced toward women than men.
Make that “WAY more pronounced..”